Wednesday, June 11, 2008


I burn like a redhead and barely tan. For years I have been trying to get the sunless tanning lotion to work with me, and this Monday I finally got it right. I managed to have it applied all over without any streaking or oranginess. I used the Build-a-Tan so it was a very pale, subtle tan. However, it was enough for me. I could tell a difference, and it was a nice change from my pasty, pasty skin. The very next day I flung myself into a killer workout, and sweat like the pig I am. Every couple of minutes I had to wipe the perspiration from my face just to keep it under a semblance of control. After an hour of this, my nice white gym towel was brown on both sides. Yup, my self-image raising tan was GONE.

I do I have to say it was easier to handle than the time I wore a new, extra-long teal tank top to teh (alliteration much?) gym and stained my torse green for three days.

People rarely approach me for conversation. In a new situation where I need to make friends (school, clubs, etc) I can count on having to be the one to make the first move. I swear to God there is some sort of force field around me, in every high school class where there was one more desk than student, it would be by me. I every school project with the option of working in pairs or singles, I was the only partnerless scholar. It sucked. It sucked harsh. So yesterday, a guy saw me looking at WWTDD? and commented that it was a good movie, and he had recently checked out the book. I was so confused (Did he mean Fight Club? Or is it really also a book?) that I couldn't utter a sound. After a short, awkward silence he turned away and put his headphones on. I could have had a conversation! With a person! And I blew it! GAAAHHH!

Today at the library I felt an odd, heavy thump on the back of my chair. I turned around to see a cute girl-toddler sprawled behind me on the floor and bursting into sympathy-inducing wails, she had hit one of the rungs hard enough to knock herself over. I looked at her as her mom came swooping in and thought, "My smooveness! It's contagious! Oh no!"

On the bright side, the cats are bound to catch it. Hilarity, it will ensue.

1 comment:

That Chick Over There said...

I cannot, no matter how hard I try, get the self-tanner right. I always end up vaguely Oompa-Loompaish.