Wednesday, May 30, 2007

Thanks for nothing, Muhammed ibn Musa al-Khowarizmi!

I am taking algebra for the first time in 12 years, which is more than the expected lifespan of a Great Dane. I will spend the next 8 weeks rationalizing my denominators and factoring my primes (wait, no I won't). Tomorrow I may even get to meet my teacher! For some reason he couldn't teach class last night, perhaps he thinks syllabus day is pointless. He told the substitute the wrong room, which got everything off to a fabulous start. He immediately gave us a test with squiggles on it, than cackled that he would give us nightmares. Seriously. The syllabus contained a page on how to format our homework. It has 11 numbered bullets, 24 lettered bullets, and 8 roman numeraled bullets. Here's a taste:

3. The first sheet should be a cover sheet containing the following:
a. Name.
b. Homework ID, Which would usually be Chapter and Section.
c. Table of times worked with columns for:
i. Date;
ii. Start time;
iii. Stop time; and
iv. Time worked

This is my favorite part:

7. Put the cover sheet on top of the pile of homework pages.
8. Fold the stack of papers vertically bringing the right side over the left side
9. Leaving an one-quarter inch gap, crease the fold.

This is verbatim, it makes me glad he is not my grammar teacher. I am also glad the substitute is not my English teacher, he misspelled "nickels" and says unwords like "irregardless."

My class also has a That Guy. This That Guy sits in the back of the class and shouts out comments, asks condescending questions that imply he believes he is smarter than the teacher, and he apparently thinks he's funny. He's not. Trust me. I have not seen this That Guy (I sit in the front), but I would not be surprised if he's one of those too skinny 19 year old That Guys with baggy clothes and bad posture. Only time will tell. Or maybe turning my head will tell too.

I'm trying to think of this as a "Mathemagical Adventure!" There are plenty of cliff-hangers: Will I ever see the true teacher? Will I get an A? Will I care? Will I smack around that annoying waste of carbon? Will I remember how to use a graphing calculator? Will I feel like an idiot most of the time? Stay tuned to find out all these answers and more as I Go! To! Class!


rabidmonkey said...

OMG, i think your prof has lost his mind. math homework should never, ever involve a cover sheet. and why the hell does he care what time you did your homework? i could maybe understand this kind of anal bullshit in an advanced math class (the kind only math majors take) but we're talking about algebra here. counting high school and the time i audited because i forgot everything, i've taken calc 4 times and i have never been told how to format my homework.

velocibadgergirl said...

I want to crotch punch That Guy already. If you need help, MB will be happy to provide it. He's weird and actually likes math more than most people.