Saturday, February 3, 2007

White trash

I finished reading Garbage Land by Elizabeth Royte. Basically, we are self indulgent capitalist pig-dogs who don't fully comprehend how sweet our deal is. That isn't exactly what the author said, but it's how I felt. She wrote very well, she packed in an enormous amount of information while entertaining me, and she never got preachy. Now I have begun A People's History of the United States. God. Damn. First, it's great. It's compelling and shocking and I only have to read about fifteen pages before I fall asleep. Not because it is boring, but because it is exhausting. It seems my history teachers didn't exactly lie as much as they sugar-varnished the events that shaped our country.

The last couple of weeks have truly sucked. Crazy Baby-killing Lady has been driving me nuts, I plan to do everything in my power to move her out of state. Brain Damaged Lady has been skipping her meds and has gone all delusional and hateful on me. She called the secretary yesterday and told her there was an announcement on the radio that I (and her guardian) had been arrested. One of my favorite patients who made my job worth keeping is moving to Texas today. I didn't get to say good-bye. I got to see one of my good friends this week for the first time in a long while...and she was overwhelmingly grumpy. Not that she should be happy all the time, but it made me feel helpless. My uncle died and I have been serioulsy ill for the last week. The point of this blurb is not to bitch until you hate me, it is to come to this: last night I picked up my 1099 from my last place of employment. While I was there I got a free Reiki session which made me feel fantastic. I got two hugs from a co-worker that I always liked but I wasn't sure if she liked me. I was invited to work at the spa my old comrades plan to open this summer. The only thing that got me out of bed this week was to imagine that something worthwhile happens every day and I just have to find it. I was very surprised to find that my strategy worked.

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